Friday, April 22, 2011

80's sitcom....A little Jaeger.... And some spray paint!!!! YAY!


So it's not to often that medical supplies wet my appetite....I'm not usually perusing my local Medical supply warehouse looking at the latest commodes or wheelchairs, or urine bottles; but recently I have become quite the connoisseur of all things medical. Spending some time in the hospital I have come to enjoy a good "johnny" and a nice leg brace.... So as I was fitted for crutches that were to become my "best buddies" for the next four months I was so excited (I hope the sarcasm isn't to much to chew on I may have cooked it a little too much)....... These crutches came with the  meeting of  these two lovely ladies from the occupational therapy world I couldn't help but think had been the stars of a long lost sitcom from the 80's called "Pearl and Maude, The OT Ladies" ( I would watch their show). Anyways as these ladies helped me navigate what would be come my 4 legged stance for the next couple of months I knew they had the love in their eyes for the Medical equipment like I now had.....As I arrived home with my run of the mill sticks I still felt that if Pearl and Maude had given them to me, they were mine and I needed to love them just like I would my own legs.... Staring at these things staring back at me I couldn't help but think they were like, "Yeah so we have been under every one's armpits, don't think your special, after we are done here we will be in someone else's pits" I started to think my nomad crutches didn't even really want to help me out. I was being used like a common street whore. In the midst of my misery I received a phone call from my boys Street Bob and Chopper Jim, asking, "What I was doing?" (This has become a common joke that my buddy Street Bob asks because he knows I can't walk so he insists on asking me what I'm up too every time he talks with me) I replied, "Just hanging out man"....I could tell  by their giddiness  on the phone  it meant only a couple things; they were either drunk, or drunk.....As I listened to their babbling on the phone I gathered that they had something for me. .....Now keep in mind these are the types of guys that would show up to my house in vintage leisure suits talking about how they had been doing burnouts in a garage with a vintage moped that they might have stolen....... Street Bob went on to say, "Hey  we made something for you but if you don't like it please act like you do because it was a lot of work" This, I thought, could go in any direction.....I decided to play along and told them to bring the dead hooker, I mean gift, by.......As they pulled up They ran into my house with the giddiness that only a couple of shots of Jaeger could produce........They simply said, "You ready" and I was not, but when I opened my eyes I felt  like a 12 year old opening his eyes to his new bike.....BAAAAM....What lay before me was something of total beauty, something that took time and love, and something that made my other street hore crutches fall over....I immediately wanted to call Pearl and Maude and say,"You guys will never believe what I got"........What lay before me were some custom Flat Black  and Brass riveted Crutches......My very own, they were not going in anyone else's armpits, just mine......These beauties were the work of my two best buds.... and I couldn't wait to figure out how to get out of bed to use these babies....I knew that little crippled boys and little crippled girls would be so jealous that they would bow down, or limp down, or something at my mangled leg and worship these medical beauties........ thanks guys ....It's the little things.....

No comments:

Post a Comment